Feb 8, 2011

Always that "Trying to Fit In"

Several days ago, I had my oral exam for my philosophy class with Amanda and Homie and I kinda realized something while studying Theravada & Zen Buddhism and Immanuel Kant.

We always thought that fitting in was a thing in high school. You wear clothes that are in, listen to music that everyone tries to listen to, hang out in the same place where everyone else is and do the same shit as everybody does. High school is that harsh environment where you'd be judged everywhere you go so to cope up, you try to group with people with the same interests - or at least try to fit into that group.

Turns out it doesn't stop there.

College may have forced out some maturity in most of us but that sense of trying to be unique and trying to go against the mainstream still comes from the need to fit in a world that values uniqueness and originality. I'm not sure if you get my point here.

We have objectified reality in two ways: 1) mainstream have created these trends, ideals and groups where people are constantly forced to follow, or 2) we believe in that constant need to be different so we try to look for established sub-cultures that we find (simply to put it) cool.

I think we have lost so much sense of what reality really is. How do we cope in a world built by mutually accepted delusions? If you'd be conscious about it, being the real you is always a struggle.

Personally, I think I fit in the second option above. I do not watch/follow ANY tv series/show. I paint, love fashion and blog. I'm even in to this whole environmental thing. But is that really what I want? I'm not saying that this is not me but I just have to be sure because I think it will create an internal dissonance in the long run.

Listening to yourself that allows you to expose who you really are will produce a genuine you. I think meditation, reflection, prayer or whatever you call it will help you with this. Maybe I wrote this topic because I personally haven't listened to what I really am. Maybe this whole noise of media is to blame, maybe school/org work, or maybe I just don't want to listen because I still had that sense of trying to fit in.

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